Thanks for your post. As a woman that now has grown children (one married and one engaged), there is definitely a different vibe. Yes, there are things to "be concerned about", but I decided to go on a solo vacation across the country, and not having to plan for everyone else? Liberating and also a bit terrifying. What do I WANT to do? Shouldn't I be outside, enjoying nature, getting exercise? Since I'm by myself the local diner sat me at the counter and I realized I've never sat at the counter before. Huh....a new experience all around.
Cindy!!! I just took my first solo trip this past year too and it was life changing!!! That question: what do I WANT to do? Yes. Liberating and terrifying and so deeply deeply good. XO
I completely and wholly love your perspective here — the ways our ‘should’ can follow us — that’s a whole post in and of itself. Knowing you have chosen to push past and through, THAT is beautiful. I honor you in that. 💛🥹🙌✨
I had coffee with Mel yesterday and she so gently rephrased my use of 'should' and I've been holding onto that since we met. Then I saw your post and it's clear that dirty words are so different than I ever thought them to be.
Whew! I was always so confused growing up how some words were worse than others — weren’t they all just vocabulary pieced together? We add the meaning to them. And we get to decide the weight each word holds. I have found so much power in that. 💛
I feel like I try to tell my husband this. Even his mom who worked as a teacher did all this bc his dad was superintendent plus owned a farm. So she ran their schedules and sports and and...
I have the added burden of medical appts for my son and his asthma and dental appts in the city and kids OT etc. Hubby asked why I hadn't taken our fake tree that stopped lighting end of the holidays an hour plus away to drop off off yet. U should have because you're here all day and....
I've been so exhausted post parent caretaking and loss on TOP OF all the things that it got left until kids started their first year of full day school at the same time and place. Ages 6 and 8 and ones a hurricane.
While we can live our kids abs being a mom i feel I suck at being a friend and being a presence for anything else. There's only so much real estate and we have nobody helping us. His parents are retired and spend it traveling and going elsewhere. Anywhere but to see their kids and grandkids. It's a thing.
But I also see grandparents who take care of kids all day while parents work or watch them til after dinner every weeknight. They are also carrying the load (mostly grandmas).
“There is only so much real estate”. I felt this one DEEP. Every bit of this is such shared experience even when our circumstances look different. I’ve come back and read your words multiple times Beth, esp that last question we all whisper to ourselves at some point. With you. X
This. So much this. Does it ever end? Or do we come to the end of ourselves and realize we answered the wrong questions asked by those we had no business listening to? Yep. Time to Burn. It. All. Down. Animal nature and natural world have spoken deeply to me lately. They're excellent and helping us ask OURSELVES deep questions that bring us to our answers. The most decent spiritual director I've had have 4 legs or wings and a beak or trees and roots.
Echoing Corinne’s reply here because YES. This. I am so grateful for the questions you asked and the keys they are for all of us to admit we ask the same ones. Holding room for all of it, the truth and the questions, alongside you.
Thanks for your post. As a woman that now has grown children (one married and one engaged), there is definitely a different vibe. Yes, there are things to "be concerned about", but I decided to go on a solo vacation across the country, and not having to plan for everyone else? Liberating and also a bit terrifying. What do I WANT to do? Shouldn't I be outside, enjoying nature, getting exercise? Since I'm by myself the local diner sat me at the counter and I realized I've never sat at the counter before. Huh....a new experience all around.
Cindy!!! I just took my first solo trip this past year too and it was life changing!!! That question: what do I WANT to do? Yes. Liberating and terrifying and so deeply deeply good. XO
I completely and wholly love your perspective here — the ways our ‘should’ can follow us — that’s a whole post in and of itself. Knowing you have chosen to push past and through, THAT is beautiful. I honor you in that. 💛🥹🙌✨
I had coffee with Mel yesterday and she so gently rephrased my use of 'should' and I've been holding onto that since we met. Then I saw your post and it's clear that dirty words are so different than I ever thought them to be.
I love Mel and her gentle ass-kicking.
Yes, that's a better way to put it!!!
Whew! I was always so confused growing up how some words were worse than others — weren’t they all just vocabulary pieced together? We add the meaning to them. And we get to decide the weight each word holds. I have found so much power in that. 💛
I feel like I try to tell my husband this. Even his mom who worked as a teacher did all this bc his dad was superintendent plus owned a farm. So she ran their schedules and sports and and...
I have the added burden of medical appts for my son and his asthma and dental appts in the city and kids OT etc. Hubby asked why I hadn't taken our fake tree that stopped lighting end of the holidays an hour plus away to drop off off yet. U should have because you're here all day and....
I've been so exhausted post parent caretaking and loss on TOP OF all the things that it got left until kids started their first year of full day school at the same time and place. Ages 6 and 8 and ones a hurricane.
While we can live our kids abs being a mom i feel I suck at being a friend and being a presence for anything else. There's only so much real estate and we have nobody helping us. His parents are retired and spend it traveling and going elsewhere. Anywhere but to see their kids and grandkids. It's a thing.
But I also see grandparents who take care of kids all day while parents work or watch them til after dinner every weeknight. They are also carrying the load (mostly grandmas).
So does it ever end?
“There is only so much real estate”. I felt this one DEEP. Every bit of this is such shared experience even when our circumstances look different. I’ve come back and read your words multiple times Beth, esp that last question we all whisper to ourselves at some point. With you. X
This. So much this. Does it ever end? Or do we come to the end of ourselves and realize we answered the wrong questions asked by those we had no business listening to? Yep. Time to Burn. It. All. Down. Animal nature and natural world have spoken deeply to me lately. They're excellent and helping us ask OURSELVES deep questions that bring us to our answers. The most decent spiritual director I've had have 4 legs or wings and a beak or trees and roots.
I’m HOLLERING over here! YES.
Echoing Corinne’s reply here because YES. This. I am so grateful for the questions you asked and the keys they are for all of us to admit we ask the same ones. Holding room for all of it, the truth and the questions, alongside you.
Thank you Sarah
So true
I know you know 💛